Right Turn Clyde
Volume 1 Issue 7.5 - Goodnight To The Rock-n-Roll Era
Your Monthly Dose Of Cynicism

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The Lip's Hall Of Mulletude
A Year Of Film That Was Short On Top And Long In Back

I know, I know, typically, mullets=bad. No matter how hard I try to understand this, I honestly don't understand. People with mullets not only have style, taste, and an extra-special dose of fashion forwardness, but they are, simply put, rokken. "Screw you!" they shout to the masses . . . "F off, you 90210 minions!" they scream from the rooftoops . . ."TUFF GUY!" their rear bumbers proclaim for all to see. Mullets are bad ass. Thus and therefore, I have decided to rank the movies of 1999 according to the only true barometer of class: Mulletude.

Movies that I saw that came out this year, by Mulletude
1. Mystery Men (most Mulletude)
2. Fight Club
3. Austin Powers 2
4. American Beauty
5. The Matrix
6. Rushmore
7. Go
8. The Sixth Sense
9. An Ideal Husband
10. South Park
11. Election
12. Notting Hill (least Mulletude)

Movies With The Most KICKASS Music
1. Mystery Men (Hey now, . . .you're an allstar . . . EVERYBODY NOW . . get your game on . . .YEAH!!)
2. Go / The Matrix (tie)
4. South Park
5. Rushmore
6. Austin Powers 2
7. That Volvo commercial with the house song. I know it doesn't count, but that song has invaded the very core of my being.

Top 5 Crazy Twists In Movies In 1999
(Reader beware: I am giving away the twist. If you haven't seen the movie, stop reading now)
1. Mystery Men (you get to the theatre, you sit down, you look up. . . . YES, that IS Pee Wee Herman with acne)
2. The Matrix (Holy crap! Keanu Reeves can act!)
3. American Beauty (Creepy Marine guy tries to lock lips with Kevin S. Freaked me the frick out anyway)
4. Notting Hill (Hugh Grant's charm does, in fact, wear out)
5. Eyes Wide Shut (Tom Cruise looks like crap)


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