3 Big Stars, 2 Dick Jokes, And A Drunk Santa Pissing On A Christmas
Tree: RTC's Holiday Video Pacifier
"Let's hear it for the holidays!"
This is the only time of the year where you can ever hear someone
say, "DEAR GOD, PLEASE LET ME SEE HOME ALONE AGAIN!" and
their pitiful prayers will be answered. You see, the bigwigs in
TV Land (the fictional domain of television fatcats, not the cable
network) know that, like clockwork, you are drunk on "juiced" eggnog
this time of year and you'll watch any thing that reeks of hearth-warming
cheer, so we get NETWORK PREMIERES of stuff you swore you'd never
see in theaters plus new Christmas "staples" like Home For The
Holidays (Fun holiday game - watch this and try and spot the
scenes in which Robert Downey Jr. took his "medicine" before).
All this "peace on earth" crap makes us wanna start a teenage riot.
That's why when we gather the old folks around the "family pet"
(our tv), we like to pop in Ted Demme's The Ref.
For pure unadulterated, profane dysfunction, you can't beat Kevin
Spacey and Denis Leary cracking wise while Judy Davis does what
Judy Davis does best (I'm a longtime believer that nobody rolls
the "F" word off their lips with more seething viciousness than
Ms. D). So, here RTC presents a few off our favorite lines from
The Ref that had Grandma reaching for her MedicAlert bracelet
Spacey: What's your name?
Leary: Fuck you. that's my name.
Spacey (to Judy Davis):The day you see anything through to
the end, I'll stick my own dick in my ear.
Baranski: The spirit of Christmas is either you're good or
you're punished and you burn in hell.
Baranski: Who would catch a criminal and set them free?
Spacey: Caroline, why don't you eat something?
Davis: Lloyd, why don't you eat me?
Hey, did anyone know that The Ref was also known as
No Panic and Hostile Hostages? Now you do, Smarty